Archive for February, 2011

Our Testeem

Posted: February 26, 2011 in Mikveh Alon
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As usual I want this blog to be short, but it will likely end up being longer than I originally expect it to be because I’ll slowly remember what we did this week as I type. At this point I despise when I know I need to/should (you know there isn’t a word for “should” in hebrew?) write a blog, especially right now.

I’m laying in bed with my girl watching the Big Lebowski… BREAKING NEWS: she just said she want’s to play Resident Evil on playstation with me… seriously, she gets more awesome every day. She listens to Guns & Roses and Pink Floyd. She watches family guy, two and a half men, 30 rock and the big bang theory. What is going on… stop kissing me… this isn’t fair.

Let me stop for a second and excuse my blog for being terrible this week – it’s Rotem’s fault. But Rotem is also being great and letting me write this in the first place so let’s all give her a round of applause. ::clap, clap, clap::

The title of this entry has nothing to do with genitalia – although I’ll admit, being in the army has forced me to see more penis’ than I’ve ever wanted to see. From Bear’s casual drop of his towel for no reason, to this kid Ben’s massive penis… I digress. I don’t know where I was going with that. Testeem is actually what the commanders call our tests, it’s always hilarious when they attempt to translate an english word into hebrew. The real word for test is “Meevchan” but for us stupid kids at Mikveh Alon, they say testeem.

We had our Hebrew test this week to see how we’ve progressed in the course as well as a physical called a “barour”. I think I did okay on the Hebrew test, not “mooshlam” (perfect) but good enough. I spoke very well, but royally screwed up the reading and writing part. oh well. It’s ok because I destroyed the physical. 80 pushups, 86 situps and I ran the 2km in 7:47. BAM!

Here’s a “quickie” about this weekend –  I started off in my kibbutz, went to Tel Aviv with my adopted family to see a flamenco show, saw my good friend Edan who may be joining the army as well? Went to Kibbutz Kfar Masaryk to see my friend Liana who extended her birthright trip a whole week just to see me! Today (Saturday), Rotem picked me up from the kibbutz and I had dinner with her at her house. Tomorrow it’s back to the army…

I have my gibbush (tryout) for Tzanchanim (paratroopers) on Monday and my Teckas (ceremony) for the end of Mikveh Alon on Wednesday. BARUCH HASHEM!!! (praise g-d… for you non-jewsers out there) I’m so glad this course is finally over and I get to go to the “real” army.

Well, I could have written more but I’m seriously getting distracted by all the awesome things going on around me… playstations, family guys and a certain girl laying next to me.

Peace out guys and gals, till next time.

EXTREME SNEEOHT!

Posted: February 19, 2011 in Mikveh Alon
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It’s been two weeks on base. It’s Saturday night at 9pm. I have to wake up at 6am tomorrow. I don’t want to write this blog.

That being said, here goes an extremely quick recount of the past two weeks that hopefully I will be able to elaborate upon next week. If I don’t have time… sorry, it’s just one of those things that will be stuck in my memory for me to enjoy reminiscing about.

Again, that being said, my headphones are lost and/or stolen. I annoyed everyone for the whole week about it. Sorry tzevet chamesh (unit 5), I just really don’t like losing things. We did shmeera (guard duty) for the first time, it’s not half bad. If you do it with someone else you get to talk to them for 2 hours, if you do it by yourself, you get to talk to yourself for 2 hours…

We’ve all, especially me, begun to get fed up with our mefakdot (commanders). They’re 18-19 year old little girls. They seriously don’t know how to do their jobs half the time, plus we’ve realized that they have very little power over us unless we do something really bad. If we do something dumb, it’s just pushups or running – which at this point I need to do anyway (dad, if  you’re reading this, I just fixed “anyways” to “anyway” – thanks for always yelling at me for that!) to workout for my gibbush (tryout) for tzanchaneem (paratroopers). Gibbush Tzanchaneem is 8 days away and I’m excited and a little nervous about it. Until then I’m working out and continuing the stupidity that Mikveh Alon has turned into.

Buffoons

Since we’ve gotten bored of everything we tediously do throughout the day we find little things to jazz up the place. Two weeks ago it was us leading up to “ehser shniot” (10 seconds) by yelling “eeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHSER shneeoht”. Now this past week I made up “EXTREME SHNEEOHT!”. Twenty Seconds in Hebrew is “Esreem sneeoht”, so it was obviously the next logical step of buffoonery for us to take. We got yelled at by our Somelet (platoon leader) for both of them… onto find out the next thing to annoy them with…

We went to Jerusalem – it was cool. I could write a lot about it, but I’m not going to now. We went on two “Masoht” (journeys/hikes). I’m also not going to write about those.

The Kotel

Top of Mount Arbel... Our second Masa

We have a test coming up this week to determine our level of Hebrew. Great idea for the army to test us after we haven’t had classes for about a week right? I thought so. Dumbasses. Everyone I spoke to about Mikveh said this time would come, and I’m saying it now, I’m not very happy with Mikveh Alon at this point. It’s like second semester senior year, I just want out and I don’t care how I act anymore.

It’s not all bad though, Mikveh Alon is almost over. Soon I’ll be in the “real” army getting my ass beat by my real commanders. Oddly enough that isn’t supposed to be sarcastic, I really am looking forward to the real army. I’ve got a girl by my side, a great adopted family and everything in Israel is at it’s greenest. Life is good, but nevertheless, fuck you Mikveh Alon.

There are a TON of new pics from the past two weeks, so check them out on the Lone Soldier Flickr Page. Pictures will have to tell the thousands of words I didn’t feel like typing this week. The Lone Soldier Facebook Page always tells the quick anecdotes I don’t have time for here, so become a fan over there!

p.s. Hebrew word of the day: מדהים – Madheem – (Awesome!)

p.s.s. I just looked back at my Flickr pictures and realized how much I did in the past two weeks…

It’s Gonna Be a Dirty Two Weeks

Posted: February 6, 2011 in Mikveh Alon
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This is gonna be quick and to the point. I felt like I needed some sort of update since I’m gonna be on base for 2 weeks. We have guard duty over the weekend so we need to stay there the whole two weeks!

If you want to see a lot of what’s been going on the past week or two check out Flickr. I’ve teamed up with another guy on base who’s been allowed to shoot pictures with a real camera… The pictures are fantastic! Thanks Benny!

This past week and coming week I’ve been designated as the Mefikedet’s helper/ personal bitch. It’s supposed to be an honor, but I really think it’s a punishment. All I’m doing all day is keeping track of everything for the commander. It basically just makes her job easier… ugh.

I feel like I’m taking a shit after showering, I’ve had a great, refreshing four days off and now I’m just dirtying myself up again. The shame! Apparently we might be doing a trip to Jerusalem to see Yad Vashem and some other things so that should be really interesting with the army. I’m not totally sure if that’s know or the week after though. I haven’t known our schedule since the first week…

I’m gonna miss a lot of things these two weeks, namely sleep, home cooked foods and a particular Israeli girl I’ve been seeing – those are in no particular order… I know I’m gonna come back drained and ready to do a lot of nothing in two weeks.

I’ll try to post some pics and updates on the Facebook page while I’m out – definitely gonna have some from guard duty which could be cool!

see ya on the flip side.

I Sense a Disturbance in the Force

Posted: February 2, 2011 in Mikveh Alon, Random Thoughts
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My time in the army, although short in the grand scheme of my service as a whole, has taught me enormous amounts already. I appreciate everything outside the army as if I were a baby taking his first lick of an ice-cream. Life is sweet, and far too few people are tasting it!

Listening to music has become a privilege, not a necessity, as it seemed to become throughout my time in university. If music wasn’t playing while out of class, and sometimes even in class, life seemed quite and boring. With that thought in mind, I realize now that everyone listening to music 24/7 is missing out on all the beautiful auditory nuances of everyday life. I’ve also become aware that on top of what everyone’s missing out on, listening to music ALL the time also dilutes the meaning behind the very music we care so dearly about.

Looking at the mountains and all of nature when getting off for a weekend is like discovering a new continent. I feel like Columbus (or was it Leif Ericsson?) taking his first step onto the Americas. I am Neil Armstrong on the moon, I am Buzz Lightyear taking first flight. Seeing the same surroundings all week long (even though the base has a gorgeous view) lets me savor and enjoy every sight I see on my brief weekends off.

Smells bring back vivid memories of sweet experiences, wonderful times in the past and the inevitable awkwardness of growing up. Being a child, being a student, being a dirty backpacker. All great things to reminisce about when one has the time to think their own thoughts.

Tasting the crazy foods of the Middle East is a totally new experience in and of it’s own. Most people know me as a garbage disposal eater so I love shoveling down all these new flavors! I eat avocado nearly every day, somewhat of a “delicacy” in the states, where as here it’s just a casual food to throw on a piece of toast…

And who can forget about the sense of touch. Even with my extremely callused hands from countless pushups on gravel, touching something soft is a pleasure unrivaled. A plush blanket, a furry dog, or the gentle caress of a woman…

Change has occurred, which I normally don’t like. I usually like things to stay the same, to be comfortable, but I guess that has changed as well. Life is all about moderation, something I’ve realized in the past, but even more so now. Mix it up and enjoy the good things in life. Appreciate the things you have, because it could be much, much different.

the sweet isn’t as sweet without the sour!